What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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