What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?

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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.

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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.

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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .

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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.

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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.

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