What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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