What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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