What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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