What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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