What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!

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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them

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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.

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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.

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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!

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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.

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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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