What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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