What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .
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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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