What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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