What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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