What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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I went down the local supermarket, I said, "I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it",

he said, "Those are pickled onions".

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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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