What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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