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What fish only swims at night?
A starfish.
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?
She stole his heart.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.
It's a total rip-off.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?
At the baa-baa shop.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.
Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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What was the first animal in space?
The cow that jumped over the moon!
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What do you call a mad elephant?
An earthquake.
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.
I can hardly contain myself.
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