What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.
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What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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