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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?
Squash
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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?
The batter.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don't work.
There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What do you call a cow that twitches?
Beef jerky
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?
His heart wasn't in it.
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?
It's time to go to sweep.
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