What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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I went down the local supermarket, I said, "I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it",

he said, "Those are pickled onions".

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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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