What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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