What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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