What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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