What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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