What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What do you call the king of vegetables?

Elvis Parsley.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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