What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?

An onion
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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