What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?

An onion
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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