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What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?
An onion
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?
"Trike or Treat"?
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?
Take the words out of his mouth
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?
A cheetah
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What do envelopes say when you lick them?
Nothing, it shuts them up!
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What did the clock do after it ate?
It went back four seconds!
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then
*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?
Meat and Democrats!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.
It's Hans free.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?
The bucket.
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