What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?

An onion
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Astronomers prefer the dark.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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