What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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