What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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