What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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