What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed.
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