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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?
A watch dog.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing
but you accidentally say Mother.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.
Blue sky at night: day.
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What did the painter say to the wall?
I got you covered.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?
What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What part of a fish weighs the most?
The scales.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?
Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.
Senator.
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?
Not enough sand.
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