What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the "r" sound?

Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!
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