What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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