What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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