What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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