What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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What is a boxer's favorite drink?

Punch.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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