What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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