What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.

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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine

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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow

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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.

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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!

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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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