What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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Why was the boy sitting on his watch?

Because he wanted to be on time.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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