What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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