What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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