What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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