What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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Who's richer — the butcher, the baker, or the candlestick maker?

The baker, because he has lots of dough.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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