What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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