What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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