What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?

Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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