What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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