What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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