What happened when the monster ate the electric company?

He was in shock for a week.
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What do you call the king of vegetables?

Elvis Parsley.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What kind of table has no legs.

A multiplication table.
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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