What happened when the monster ate the electric company?

He was in shock for a week.
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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What kind of dress can't be worn?

Address.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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