What happened when the monster ate the electric company?

He was in shock for a week.
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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PMS jokes are not funny...

[Period]
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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