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What happened when the monster ate the electric company?
He was in shock for a week.
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Old chemists never die,
they just stop reacting.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?
She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?
Catfish
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?
Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What did the pencil say to the paper?
I dot my i's on you!
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?
Polar Bond.
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What do whales eat?
Fish and ships.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?
One. But the guitarist has to show him first.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?
Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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