What happened when the monster ate the electric company?

He was in shock for a week.
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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