What happened when the monster ate the electric company?

He was in shock for a week.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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