What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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