What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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