What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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Who's richer — the butcher, the baker, or the candlestick maker?

The baker, because he has lots of dough.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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