What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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