What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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