What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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