What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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Why did the tree go to the dentist?

It needed a root canal.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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