What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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