What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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How many board meetings does it take to get a light bulb changed?

This topic was resumed from last week's discussion, but is incomplete pending resolution of some action items. It will be continued next week. Meanwhile . . .
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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