What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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