What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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