What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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