What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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What do you call a chicken in the 1960's?

A funky chicken.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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