What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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