What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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