What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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Why did the man take a pencil to bed?

Because he wanted to draw the curtains!
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What is a boxer's favorite drink?

Punch.
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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Were does a boat go when it is sick?

To the dock.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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