What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

Senator.
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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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