What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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