What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper

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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!

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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.

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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.

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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood

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