What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three, but they're really only one.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What kind of table has no legs.

A multiplication table.
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