What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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