What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.

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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.

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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.

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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?

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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks

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What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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