What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Astronomers prefer the dark.
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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