What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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