What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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