What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.

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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.

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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.

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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis

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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.

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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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