What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!

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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.

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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!

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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow

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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish

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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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