What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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