What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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