What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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