What has a head but no body?

A nail.

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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!

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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.

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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.

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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends

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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over

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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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