What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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