What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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