What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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