What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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Why was the baseball game so hot?

Because all the fans left!
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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