What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What are pirate's favoite treat?

Chips AHOY!!
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