What has a head but no body?

A nail.

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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.

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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.

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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.

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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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