What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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