What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What does new age music sound like played backwards?

New age music.

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How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three, but they're really only one.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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