What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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