What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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