What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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