What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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