What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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