What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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