What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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