What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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