What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile

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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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