What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?

Shocked.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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