What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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