What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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