What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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