What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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