What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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