What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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