What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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