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What has four wheels and flies?
A garbage truck.
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Why did the TV cross the road?
Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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I'm on a whiskey diet.
I've lost three days already.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?
Every year!
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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?
A marsbar!
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?
BaNa2
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
He didn't have any guts!
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?
When it's full.
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How many apples grow on a tree?
All of them.
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How do you make a goldfish old?
Take away the g
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