What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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