What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.

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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.

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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck

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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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