What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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How do you tell you're kissing a french horn player?

He/She keeps trying to stick their fist up your butt.

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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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