What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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