What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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