What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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