What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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