What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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