What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What kind of table has no legs.

A multiplication table.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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