What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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