What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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