What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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I went down the local supermarket, I said, "I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it",

he said, "Those are pickled onions".

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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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