What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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