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What has three letters and starts with gas?
A car
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?
I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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What was the first animal in space?
The cow that jumped over the moon
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?
C over lambda.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?
No one can eat just one potato ship.
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?
One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?
His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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I tried nutella on some salmon
got salmonella.
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