What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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