What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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