What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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