What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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