What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What do you call the king of vegetables?

Elvis Parsley.
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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