What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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