What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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