What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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