What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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