What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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What clothes does a house wear?

Address.
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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