What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What day of the week tastes the best?

Sunday!
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