What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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