What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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