What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?

Silverware.
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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