What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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