What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".

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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.

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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras

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Were does a boat go when it is sick?

To the dock.
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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.

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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.


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What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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