What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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