What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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