What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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