What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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