What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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