What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?

Shocked.
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