What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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How many fatalists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What does it matter? we're all gonna die anyway.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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