What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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