What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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