What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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