What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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