What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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