What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine

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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel

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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.

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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison

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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.

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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.

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