What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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