What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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