What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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