What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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