What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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