What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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