What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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