What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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