What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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