What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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