What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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