What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What is the world's longest punctuation mark?

The hundred yard dash.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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