What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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