What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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