What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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