What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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How many Southern Baptists does it take to change a light bulb?

One hundred and nine. Seven on the Lightbulb Task Force Sub-committee, who report to the 12 on the Lightbulb Task Force, appointed by the 15 on the Trustee Board. Their recommendation is reviewed by the Finance Executive Committee of five, who place it on the agenda of the 18-member Finance Committee. If they approve, they bring a motion to the 27-member Church Board, who appoint another 12-member review committee. If they recommend that the Church Board proceed, a resolution is brought to the Congregational Business Meeting. They appoint another eight-member review committee. If their report to the next Congregational Business Meeting supports the changing of a lightbulb, and the Congregation votes in favor, the responsibility to carry out the lightbulb change is passed on to the Trustee Board, who in turn appoint a seven-member committee to find the best price in new lightbulbs. Their recommendation of which hardware is the best buy must then be reviewed by the 23-member Ethics Committee to make certain that this hardware store has no connection to the Disney corporation. They report back to the Trustee Board who then commissions the Trustee in charge of the Janitor to ask him to make the change. By then the janitor discovers that one more light bulb has burned out.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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Why do some people have an instant aversion to banjo players?

It saves time in the long run.

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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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