What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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