What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!

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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop

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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.

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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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They stopped a vulture from bringing his rotting carcasses on the plane

but he said "You said I could have two carry on items!"
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