What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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