What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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