What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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