What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!

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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.

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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky

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What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.

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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison

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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink

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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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