What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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