What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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