What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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