What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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