What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?

Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces

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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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How many assholes does it take to change a light bulb?

None; assholes never see the light anyway.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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