What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What did the belly button say just before it left?

I'm outtie here!

Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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How many supply-siders does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The darkness will cause the bulb to change by itself.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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