What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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