What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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What day of the week tastes the best?

Sunday!
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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