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What is a tree's favorite drink?
Root beer.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?
Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?
Juan by Juan.
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?
Halloumi.
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What happened when the monster ate the electric company?
He was in shock for a week.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?
He gave her a ring.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?
To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?
Count Quackula!
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