What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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