What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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