What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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