What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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