What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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