What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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