What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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