What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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My pastor, he ate too many beans.

He had in his own pews.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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