What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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