What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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