What is always hot in the refrigerator?

Chili
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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Why do some people have an instant aversion to banjo players?

It saves time in the long run.

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What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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