What is always hot in the refrigerator?

Chili
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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I went to the Doctors the other day, and he said, 'Go to Bournemouth, it's great for flu'.

So I went - and I got it.
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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