What is always hot in the refrigerator?

Chili
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?

Taller
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