What is always hot in the refrigerator?

Chili
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How do crows stick together in a flock?

Velcrow.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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