What is always hot in the refrigerator?

Chili
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Two girls were born on the same day, same year, same parents, except they are not twins. Explain:

They are triplets.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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