What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?

Silverware.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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