What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!

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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish

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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?

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What has a head but no body?

A nail.

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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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