What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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