What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?

An onion
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What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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