What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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