What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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How many orgy attenders does it take to change a lightbulb?

As many as possible, and don't *ask* what they do with the old bulb.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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