What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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Were does a boat go when it is sick?

To the dock.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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