What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.
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How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Agnostics question whether electricity really exists.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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