What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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