What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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