What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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Why was the baseball game so hot?

Because all the fans left!
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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