What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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