What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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