What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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