What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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How many board meetings does it take to get a light bulb changed?

This topic was resumed from last week's discussion, but is incomplete pending resolution of some action items. It will be continued next week. Meanwhile . . .
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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