What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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