What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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