What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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