What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.
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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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