What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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