What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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What is always hot in the refrigerator?

Chili
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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