What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"



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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish

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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.

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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.

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