What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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