What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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