What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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