What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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