What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

Senator.
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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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