What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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