What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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