What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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When can't you see a cheese?

When it's pasteurised...
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Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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