What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!
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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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