What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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Why was the boy sitting on his watch?

Because he wanted to be on time.
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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