What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky

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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.

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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).

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